What happened to Kathleen Turner?

For anyone who loved Romancing the Stone and especially Kathleen Turner in her role as romance author Joan Wilder (The Joan Wilder?), you were likely as shocked as I was when I saw her recently on Californication. Now, make no mistake, she does a fantastic acting job as Sue Collini, the super-high sex-drive, no-nonsense and perverse agent, though Kathleen has always done a good job with no-nonsense roles, but she looks so...well let's just say it, she looks like a post-op professional wrestler who was always a woman on the inside. She was gorgeous. Absolutely gorgeous and sexy and totally do-able. Does everyone remember Body Heat? Damn. I get warm just thinking about it. Now, she looks like a man with a wig.

Now I have to say here, I mean no disrespect. I really like and admire Kathleen Turner and her long, impressive and varied acting career. "I don't mean to be bad, I'm just drawn that way," is one of my favorite lines to quote from a movie, ever. Kathleen's breathy-voice delivering that line as Jessica Rabbit in Roger Rabbit was superb. The voice has mostly stayed, but what happened to face? To her body?

Well, after some digging online, I realized Kathleen Turner, who is obviously a very physical person, and did a lot of her own stunts in films like Romancing the Stone, suffered from severe rheumatoid arthritis and found that in addition to her medication for the arthritis (which was most likely steroids), the alcohol helped to numb the pain. Too many steroids and too much alcohol translates into too much testosterone, and puffiness, and a very feminine, athletic, trim woman puffs up. If you want more details, I found an excerpt online of Kathleen Turner's book Send Yourself Roses. Kathleen Turner reveals her descent into alcoholism.



Now as shocking as the change in her appearance is, I vociferously applaud Kathleen Turner for not surgically altering her appearance. Brava, Kathleen! She's also not hiding out in the French Riviera. She's acting on television, stage and film still, even though I suspect sometimes she doesn't recognize herself as the person she once was...

So I guess the moral here, the thing we can all learn from Kathleen Turner, is to be yourself and then be yourself some more. Even if that means you look drastically different than in your hey-day. Hey-days can't last forever, or else they wouldn't be hey-days. So get out there, do your thing, and give the proverbial finger to anyone (myself included if Ms. Turner is so inclined) to any nay-sayers. Plastic surgery just makes people look like teflon-skinned immobilized aliens. If they don't look like that immediately post-op, they definitely look that way within 10 years.

Plus, lucky for all of us, we can still memorialize Kathleen in her old movies. Her trade-mark sass, by the way, hasn't morphed a bit, except for the predictable sass-maturation that is inevitable in an intelligent, talented, and iconic actress such as Kathleen Turner.

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Original post: May 15, 2010

My Favorite Things...Air Detox by Dr. Schulze

Originally published August 3, 2010

Recently, I shared the following information with a friend, and it reminded me that one of My Favorite Things is Air Detox by Dr. Schulze. So here's my Air Detox blog. (We have no endorsement deal as of yet, so I just share this because I truly like this stuff.)

The cool thing, and the reason it's one of my favorite products, is because we've discovered how useful it is for more than what the product was originally intended for. I like multi-purpose. Like coconut oil, milk and cream - it can be used for savory and sweet dishes. (I love multi-purpose clothing too like sarongs & reversible jeans/leggings, but that's another blog!)

One added note: Please know what you're using when you spray and use products at your home. Febreeze is very popular and understandably so - it does what it claims, right? It rids your space of odors, but the pertinent question is: how does it do that? Well, here's a website (Sustainable Baby Steps) that explains and lists some of the chemical ingredients. Scary! Here's a snippet (THIS IS ONLY A SAMPLE, FOLLOW LINK FOR LONGER LIST OF INGREDIENTS:

"Below you'll find a list of just some of the 87 chemicals found by the EWG in Febreze Air Effects, listed in order of their toxicity to humans:

• BHT - Known as a neurotoxin, endocrine disruptor, immunotoxicity, non-reproductive organ system toxicity, skin eye and lung irritator
• Propylene Glycol - Causes cancer, allergies, toxic to immune system, accumulates in the system, non-reproductive organ system toxin, is classified with "enhanced skin absorption" and irritates the skin, eye and lung
• 1,3-Dichloro-2-propanol - Carcinogenic (causes cancer)

Now that I got that caveat out of the way, here's just some of the ways we use Dr. Schulze's Air Detox:

• Bathroom Air Freshener Why does pooh smell bad to humans? Well, here's a little known fact I recently learned. Anyone who's ever had a dog knows that poop does not smell bad to a dog, but it usually smells very bad to us. The reason? Dogs will eat doo-doo as a nutritional supplement because their pooh often contains undigested food and essential nutrients. Doo-doo for us can be deadly as human pooh is riddled with e-coli and other health-hazards, hence pooh smells bad to us, good to dogs.
• Travel/Airplane Disinfectant I spray this on me before flying as it helps the air around me smell better and I swear stay more fresh. Because the oils in Air Detox are disinfectant, it also (potentially) disinfects the air around me. Could be psycho-somatic, but it seems to help. I'll even spray it directly on me during the flight to refresh. So far, I've not gotten any complaints about the smell (it actually smells pretty good).
• Spray Air and Furniture after we've had clients or guests at our home Marcus and I love our friends and clients, but people bring in their own germs, smells and whathaveyou, especially since Marcus teaches martial arts and sometimes we hang out at home after class. Air Detox helps freshen and neutralize the air, especially when we have people here (myself and Marcus included) with post-martial arts stank.
• Natural Mosquito Repellent This is perhaps the most essential of all uses for Air Detox because as much as I do my best to see the good in all things, I have a hard time seeing the good in mosquitoes. War, greed, fascism, rape, disease, GMO, and hunger too, but mosquitoes, I'm still learning to love. Air Detox saves me from the awful toxicity of deet and the nasty smell of Skin So Soft or other "natural" mosquito repellents that I'm not sure are all that natural. I like spraying it on my clothing when I'll be out at night when mosquitoes are likely.
• Eucalyptus/Therapeutic steam bath at home! Dr. Schulze's website recommends spraying Air Detox profusely when running a hot bath in the bathroom to create your at-home eucalyptus steam bath. It's lovely.

It may be pricier than other air fresheners or mosquito repellents, but it lasts a lot longer because it's so concentrated. Because I'm not in a high-germ area (like a clinic, spa or hospital), I cut it with 50% water (but shake before spraying to mix). Also, you can make your own using similar ingredients, just make sure you get eucalyptus (or peppermint) and citrus (orange and/or grapefruit) oils, as these seem to have the most potent  detoxifying effects.


Here's the link for Dr. Schulze's website and Air Detox. We also love his Super-Food + and all of his detox products and programs, especially detox tea (which I drink instead of regular tea or coffee). Best on the market. Also, since Dr. Schulze products are grown and produced in the United States, they don't get irradiated like imported herbs. I don't believe Schulze is certified organic, but based on our research and experience, his products are equivalent to organic or better, as many of them are wild harvested in areas that have never seen pesticides or GMO, so that's a bonus.

Let me know what you think.

Enjoy!

Finding the G-Spot & The Joy of 3-D Animation

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If You're a Fan of Being Naked... & The Triangle of Life - Ten Ways to Survive the Next Big One

Originally published April 13, 2010

Recently we had an earthquake in the greater Los Angeles area. Nothing major. I don't think anyone or anything was severely damaged. A while back, we had a slightly larger one that also didn't severely damage anyone or anything. But the while back earthquake occurred while I lived alone in my old loft apartment.

Picture it. It was around 11am on some random weekday. Since I freelance for work, I often have weekday mornings free to do whatever I want, which usually involves sleeping in, reading, working out, writing, emailing, doing homework (when I'm in school), and on this particular morning, I was doing one of the latter activities on my computer, in bed, in my birthday suit. (It's a rough life, I know. But I drive a car that's over ten years old and I'll be paying student loans until I join AARP, so don't envy me too much.) Back to the earthquake. It's also pertinent to the story that within a week or two prior to this event I read something from some rescue specialist. I'm going to go look for it.

Okay, found it and have included it below. Thanks to Doug Copp, the rescue specialist responsible for this Triangle of Life, and the OB Rag (the local Ocean Beach paper), who published this article.

Before you read the article, though, I have to tell you what happened to me on that fateful, birthday suit morning.

Because I had recently read Mr. Copp's article (please note #2 & #4 on the ten tips below), I knew that I was supposed to lay next to large furniture. So when the earthquake started, I jumped out of bed  and went fetal next to my bed. Yep. In my birthday suit. As I was lying there, my imagination took off, picturing the search and rescue involved and the strapping young firefighters finding me buck naked in my apartment. Fortunately (or unfortunately depending on your fancy), no such search and rescue was necessary, and my modesty was saved, yet again.

Now as I write this blog, I'm clad in a similar fashion as that earthquake day. But now (lesson learned), I keep a robe really near by, since I apparently am too set in my ways to wear anything in bed.

The moral of the story, or tip #11:

If you're a fan of being naked, keep a robe nearby in case of earthquakes or other natural disasters...

Especially considering how fracking is now causing more earthquakes in places that humans haven't seen earthquakes before.

The “Triangle of Life”: Ten Ways to Survive the Next “Big One”

by Doug Copp
My name is Doug Copp. I am the Rescue Chief and Disaster Manager of the American Rescue Team International (ARTI), the world’s most experienced rescue team. The information in this article will save lives in an earthquake.
I have crawled inside 875 collapsed buildings, worked with rescue teams from 60 countries, founded rescue teams in several countries, and I am a member of many rescue teams from many countries…
I was the United Nations expert in Disaster Mitigation for two years. I have worked at every major disaster in the world since 1985, except for simultaneous disasters.
The first building I ever crawled inside of was a school in Mexico City during the 1985 earthquake. Every child was under its desk. Every child was crushed to the thickness of their bones. They could have survived by lying down next to their desks in the aisles. It was obscene, unnecessary and I wondered why the children were not in the aisles. I didn’t at the time know that the children were told to hide under something.
Simply stated, when buildings collapse, the weight of the ceilings falling upon the objects or furniture inside crushes these objects, leaving a space or void next to them... This space is what I call the “triangle of life”.
The larger the object, the stronger, the less it will compact. The less the object compacts, the larger the void, the greater the probability that the person who is using this void for safety will not be injured. The next time you watch collapsed buildings, on television, count the “triangles” you see formed. They are everywhere. It is the most common shape, you will see, in a collapsed building.

Ten Tips for Earthquake Safety

1) Most everyone who simply “ducks and covers” when buildings collapse are crushed to death.. People who get under objects, like desks or cars, are crushed.
2) Cats, dogs and babies often naturally curl up in the fetal position. You should too in an earthquake… It is a natural safety/survival instinct. You can survive in a smaller void. Get next to an object, next to a sofa, next to a large bulky object that will compress slightly but leave a void next to it.
3) Wooden buildings are the safest type of construction to be in during an earthquake. Wood is flexible and moves with the force of the earthquake. If the wooden building does collapse, large survival voids are created. Also, the wooden building has less concentrated, crushing weight. Brick buildings will break into individual bricks. Bricks will cause many injuries but less squashed bodies than concrete slabs.
4) If you are in bed during the night and an earthquake occurs, simply roll off the bed. A safe void will exist around the bed. Hotels can achieve a much greater survival rate in earthquakes, simply by posting a sign on The back of the door of every room telling occupants to lie down on the floor, next to the bottom of the bed during an earthquake.
5) If an earthquake happens and you cannot easily escape by getting out the door or window, then lie down and curl up in the fetal position next to a sofa, or large chair.
6) Most everyone who gets under a doorway when buildings collapse is killed. How? If you stand under a doorway and the doorjamb falls forward or backward you will be crushed by the ceiling above. If the door jam falls sideways you will be cut in half by the doorway. In either case, you will be killed!
7) Never go to the stairs. The stairs have a different “moment of frequency” (they swing separately from the main part of the building). The stairs and remainder of the building continuously bump into each other until structural failure of the stairs takes place. The people who get on stairs before they fail are chopped up by the stair treads – horribly mutilated. Even if the building doesn’t collapse, stay away from the stairs. The stairs are a likely part of the building to be damaged. Even if the stairs are not collapsed by the earthquake, they may collapse later when overloaded by fleeing people. They should always be checked for safety, even when the rest of the building is not damaged.
8) Get Near the Outer Walls Of Buildings Or Outside Of Them If Possible – It is much better to be near the outside of the building rather than the interior. The farther inside you are from the outside perimeter of the building the greater the probability that your escape route will be blocked.
9) People inside of their vehicles are crushed when the road above falls in an earthquake and crushes their vehicles; which is exactly what happened with the slabs between the decks of the Nimitz Freeway… The victims of the San Francisco earthquake all stayed inside of their vehicles. They were all killed. They could have easily survived by getting out and sitting or lying next to their vehicles. Everyone killed would have survived if they had been able to get out of their cars and sit or lie next to them. All the crushed cars had voids 3 feet high next to them, except for the cars that had columns fall directly across them.
10) I discovered, while crawling inside of collapsed newspaper offices and other offices with a lot of paper, that paper does not compact. Large voids are found surrounding stacks of paper.

Spread the word and save someone’s life… The Entire world is experiencing natural calamities so be prepared!
“We are but angels with one wing, it takes two to fly”

In 1996 we made a film, which proved my survival methodology to be correct. The Turkish Federal Government, City of Istanbul , University of Istanbul Case Productions and ARTI cooperated to film this practical, scientific test. We collapsed a school and a home with 20 mannequins inside. Ten mannequins did “duck and cover,” and ten mannequins I used in my “triangle of life” survival method.

After the simulated earthquake collapse we crawled through the rubble and entered the building to film and document the results. The film, in which I practiced my survival techniques under directly observable, scientific conditions, relevant to building collapse, showed there would have been zero percent survival for those doing duck and cover.
There would likely have been 100 percent survivability for people using my method of the “triangle of life.” This film has been seen by millions of viewers on television in Turkey and the rest of Europe , and it was seen in the USA , Canada and Latin America on the TV program Real TV.

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Muffin-Top Close-Ups, Angelina Jolie & Julia Roberts

Like most women in this country, I saw the movie Eat, Pray, Love.

How much fun must it have been to make this film? Italy, India, Bali, Julia Roberts, Richard Jenkins, and Javier Bardem. The actors seem fun, and though I know better – the crew contributes to the good-times of the filmmaking as much as the actors – the locations alone would’ve been worth it.

But one thing that really gets to me about Eat, Pray, Love is that it blatantly lies.

How? Well, the dialogue doesn’t match the visual in one very important, noticeable scene – especially for my fellow female viewers. And let’s face it, most viewers of Eat, Pray, Love were women (and the men they blackmailed with sex into seeing the movie).

Examples of more subtle lies are when actresses like Angelina Jolie play a role like Salt when their arms are so skinny, they probably couldn’t even manage one pull-up, let alone kicking ass or killing innumerable federal agents and Russian spies. Seriously? By the look of her arms, Angelina likely strains lifting a half-gallon carton of non-fat organic almond milk.

But in Eat, Pray, Love the lie isn’t subtle or inferred...

There’s a scene with Julia and her blonde gal-pal eating Pizza Margherita in Naples (my all-time favorite type of pizza, by the way – though I’ve never had it in Naples), and they share that they both have “muffin-tops.” According to Urban Dictionary:

Muffin Top: When a woman wears a pair of tight jeans that makes her flab spill out over the waistband. Just like the top of a muffin sits over the edge of the paper case.

After the pizza-scene, Julia and her friend go to a boutique to get new jeans. It shows the two girls helping each other, struggling to button their new jeans.

Firstly, if someone has to help me button my jeans, I’m going one size up. No questions asked. Secondly, check the picture. Do you see any muffin top?

Now it’s worth noting that I am not a skinny-girl-hater. In fact, I’ve been called a “skinny bitch” more than once by women who were speaking with vitriol of my weight more than my disposition. One friend even erroneous called me “petite.” Well, at 5 feet, 8 inches, I can assure you I do not qualify as petite, but English is her second language and for her, petite means skinny.

While I wouldn’t describe myself as skinny, I probably am skinny in the eyes of many people. At one time I bench-pressed 140 pounds, my legs can press a lot (my dad once told me I had muscular “thunder-thighs” – thanks Dad), and I can pull-up my own body weight from a straight-arm hang. With these things in mind, I’d more accurately describe my body as muscular, athletic or fit. It’s also worth noting that skinny girls can have muffin tops. It’s more about the fit of the jeans squeezing our natural womanlyness into an unsightly lump above our jeans than actual girth.

Weightlifting noted, I do have hips and curves. And I can have, with the right (or wrong as the case may be) jeans, muffin top. So, like any woman who has natural lady-curves, I know how to identify muffin top when I see, or don’t see it, as is the case in Eat, Pray, Love.

Look, I understand that Julia’s body is part of her livelihood, and though the likes of Renee Zellweger and Christian Bale have gained and lost weight, sometimes severely, Julia Roberts is not one of those actresses who gains or looses weight for her roles, at least from what I’ve seen. Can’t say I blame her, as I like to maintain a healthy weight as well.

But the movie lied saying she had a muffin top. It would’ve actually been more honest if they’d used a body-double for the close-ups of the supposed muffin top. Believe me, there would be plenty of women who could’ve doubled with their muffin top.

So please, filmmakers, try to be honest. Tough, muscular, ass-kicking women everywhere scoff at the skinny arms and legs of women playing cops, secret agents and action heroines. Lift a dumbbell and eat some whey protein for crissakes. And I’m sure muffin-top-sporting women could use a day or two of work body-doubling for Julia Roberts, at least for the muffin-top close-ups.