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Friday, April 30, 2010

A hugging, laughing, happy mess



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As many of you know, and some of you are soon to discover, Marcus has kidneys that are currently...asleep or something. Though the doctors can't explain him completely, the medical term for what he has is end-stage renal disease. Most people with this condition are depressed, cranky, low-energy, and a little crazy (due to higher acid levels in the blood - eventually it causes something called uric psychosis - no bueno). Marcus is doing remarkably well considering he hooks up to a machine every night like some bionic man, and does something called peritoneal dialysis. (You can look it up if you want to know more.) If you want to know more details about Marcus' story, check out his blog Unreasonable Happiness. We know he has some kidney function, because his blood levels (with the help of a raw, primal diet- especially the raw, organic, unrefrigerated eggs) are relatively normal. But his blood pressure is a little more sketchy. He's currently unavailable for consultation (i.e. sleeping), so maybe I'll add more detail later, but one of the side effects of his kidneys being asleep is that he often gets woozy or light headed. You know that feeling you get when you stand up too quickly? Well, he gets that feeling all the time even if he stands up slowly. He even gets that feeling when he laughs too hard. Seems to me his blood doesn't make it properly to his brain.

But here's the best part.
Apparently, I'm funny. (I always hoped that I was funny. Things I think in my head are funny and sometimes when I say them, people laugh, but sometimes they just go straight over their heads and under their radar. Nothing worse than the silence of an unlaughed joke.) Anyway. Here's how I know I'm actually funny. I make Marcus laugh so hard he either almost or sometimes fully loses consciousness.

Now the losing consciousness part isn't great. It doesn't happen 100% of the time. Usually while laughing, he'll sputter, "Oh...I'm losing consciousness..." and we take preventative measures to make sure he won't hurt himself if he does fall over, and I usually loudly tell him to breathe. Breathe! 

One time he was sitting at the table and I was doing something goofy and he actually did pass out, but it was early in our relationship so I didn't know he was going to pass out (or I wouldn't held him up), and he actually fell forward and hit his face on the table! I was so freaked out I picked him up off the table, but he had hit the computer keyboard squarely with his front teeth and one of them was cracked, though still intact. I was glad it wasn't worse (concussion, broken nose, tooth broken irreparably or bleeding profusely), but I didn't like that it cracked his tooth. He didn't mind so much. He said he'd healed cracked teeth before and knew in time it would mend (with a good, healing diet, of course).

Anyway, the best and most ridiculous thing that has come from Marcus' physiological quirk is that I've taken to holding him when we laugh, especially when we're out in the world and not near a soft bed or sofa where he can sit down, breathe, and wait for his blood to circulate.

Basically, it looks like this.

We're bantering back and forth about something. I make some crude, clever (I hope), or otherwise unexpected and funny comment, I'm laughing and Marcus is laughing, and Marcus gets that look in his eyes...I know that look now. Then he sputters, "I'm losing consciousness," and I quickly run over and put my arms around him (under his arms - it's hard to hold a passed-out-body up if you're holding them from above their shoulders). He puts his arms around my shoulders and basically we look like two drunks holding each other up while laughing hysterically.

If you're driving by and you see this, you should probably pull over for the show.

It's good times for everyone.

So, I'm proposing a new social edict.

Hold each other when you laugh.

Check it out. When you hold someone who's laughing, it's virtually impossible not to laugh yourself. Also, it's virtually impossible to tell who's holding whom. It becomes a hugging, laughing, happy mess.

Try it out. I think you'll like it.

As always, let me know how it goes.


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Posted by Katie Strand at 12:10 PM 1 comments
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Thursday, April 29, 2010

The HPV vaccination could be more dangerous than what it "prevents"

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Like many Americans, I watch some television. Though I probably watch less than average, I've grown to enjoy some unwind time with shows like 30 Rock, The Marriage Ref, Fringe and The Mentalist, a few of my favorites, and most of which can be viewed at Hulu.com. (There was a time when I didn't have TV and only watched movies and I also enjoyed that - so I guess I'm flexible within my entertainment options.) Now I like hulu not only because I can watch shows at my own convenience, but because hulu has fewer commercials than regular television. When I do watch "regular" television, it can only be tolerated if I fast-forward through the commercials or (if I don't have tivo or DVR), mute the commercials and read a book while they're extolling the latest fast-food invention (food now is more invention than actual food) or pharmaceutical promising to make my life better.

But lately even Hulu has been getting on my nerves because it's been frequently running these HPV vaccination commercials. Now the following is only my opinion, and I'm going to quote Dr. Mercola, as he's an M.D. and I am not, but these commercials always elicit an adverse reaction in me. I haven't seen this much fear-mongering and propaganda since we studied the Nazi regime in world history. If you haven't seen the ad yet, it basically scares women into getting the HPV vaccination with a series of "what ifs." e.g.: "What if my boyfriend in college gave me HPV and I don't know it and later on it develops into cervical cancer and I can't have husband, children, and the perfect life..." Then the commercial shows a very depressed, hairless, chemo-therapy-receiving young woman looking sad because she (as it is implied) got cervical cancer when it could have been so easily avoided with a simple vaccination.

Well, this vaccination is not so simple, it seems, nor is it harmless. As you will read in the following article from Dr. Mercola's website on the HPV vaccination, the vaccination is not only unreliable, it's potentially deadly  and could cause infertility! And the government is considering requiring the vaccination! Unbelievable! Now I realize I'm doing my own fear-mongering myself here, and that is not my primary intention. My intention is to help people out in the world become more aware so that they can make more informed decisions and lead happy, healthy lives; men and women alike because you women out there need to make informed choices about your bodies, and you men out there need to inform and look out for the women in your life. Also, as Dr. Mercola states in the end of his article, the key is to live a healthy lifestyle, because your immune system will naturally fight off illness and disease the more you live and eat holistically.

I'd love your input in the comments below. Please feel free to share the link to this blog with anyone you feel compelled to share it with. Just send the link:

Here's the article from Dr. Mercola on the dangers of the HPV vaccination:


Three Girls Died, Others Hospitalized, After HPV Vaccine
Posted by: Dr. Mercola
June 14 2007 | 123,860 views

Amid controversy over state legislatures in the U.S. requiring young girls to take Gardasil, Merck's new vaccine for human papillomavirus (HPV), severe side effects are being reported.
1,637 adverse reactions have been reported by Judicial Watch, a public interest watchdog, including three girls who died shortly after receiving the immunization. Judicial Watch obtained the reports from the U.S. Food and Drug Administration using the Freedom of Information Act.
In Australia, 25 girls who had just received their first injection of the vaccine experienced headache, nausea, and dizziness. In some cases, the problems were so severe that they were hospitalized. Shares of the vaccine's Australian developer, CSL, fell after the incident was reported in the news.

British Medical Journal June 9, 2007;334:1182-1183


Dr. Mercola's Comment:
Should young girls be required to take Gardasil by the government when possible side effects include hospitalization and death? There have also been reports from the National Vaccine Information Center about fainting and dizziness reported by dozens of patients as side effects of Gardasil, and there are even some concerns that Gardasil may cause infertility.
These are steep risks for a vaccine that only sometimes protects against HPV, which is virtually 100 percent avoidable without an expensive and potentially fatal vaccine.
Please realize that Merck has manipulated the medical and political system to FORCE children to get this dangerous vaccine for their own bottom line profit.  The potential promised reduction of cervical cancer is the bait they use.
Remember Merck, the manufacturer of this vaccine, is the same company that made Vioxx that killed over 60,000 people.
It is also important to understand that this year, some 11,000 women will be diagnosed with cervical cancer, which can be caused by HPV, and about 3,700 will die from it. In comparison, 16 times more American women will be diagnosed with breast cancer (178,480), and 11 times more will die from it (40,460).

As Merck's own literature says, it is important to realize that Gardasil does not protect women against some "non-vaccine" HPV types. So, even if girls accept the risks and get vaccinated, they can still get HPV.

Finally, although more than 6 million women contract HPV each year, a woman's immune system is often strong enough to clear up the infection on its own. About 90 percent of HPV infections simply clear up within two years.
Remember, it is NOT the infection that is the issue as much as it is the person's immune system. You can be exposed to these bacteria and viruses and if you are living a healthy lifestyle your body's immune system will typically know how to address the infection.


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Posted by Katie Strand at 10:26 AM 2 comments
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Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Is Jake Pavelka a douche bag?


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I know people who've worked on The Bachelor and Bachelorette. In theory, I think it's sort of an interesting social experiment. But I can't stand to watch the show. I've tried. It's in the news. There seems to be intrigue, but they draw everything out so much, it makes me annoyed and impatient. Not very zen, I know, but I think the last thing the bachelor is about is being zen.

This latest one, of which I watched maybe one episode, had a guy named Jake Pavelka. During the show, he seemed like a bit of a tool. I can objectively see that he's cute and has an attractive body, but the minute he opens his mouth or even makes a face, douche!

I wish it were different. I wish The Bachelor would actually cast people who are actually compelling, attractive (holistically), intelligent, and funny. But it seems the priority of The Bachelor is to cast douche-bags and ditsy, silicon-stuffed, cat-fighting women.

Part of why I think Jake is a douche bag is because I've been watching Dancing with the Stars. This show also drags things out tremendously, but at least there's dancing, which I like, and though I haven't watched most of the seasons, Pamela Anderson and Niecy Nash were too enticing for me to pass up. Pamela, it seems, can't help dripping with sex no matter what she's doing; Niecy never fails to entertain and draw laughter. It's mindless but entertaining and a nice way to unwind or take a break from my hypnotherapy studies, blog and book writing.

But every time Jake opens his mouth to answer interview questions, or talks to his partner during rehearsal, or just says some cheesy line to the camera, my stomach literally turns. Marcus says he's a tool, but douche bag is description that keeps coming up for me.

Does anyone else feel this way or am I just being critical?

Has anyone out there ever interacted or worked with him so they can weigh-in?

I hope I'm wrong, but he just seems like an attention-hungry, desperate, douche-bag.

Sorry, Jake. Hope I'm wrong. If I'm not, please take a break from the reality-show circuit, and get yourself to an Ashram to spend some time introspecting. Even if you come out spouting spiritual but douchey vernacular, at least you'll give America a break from your mug.



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Tuesday, April 27, 2010

It's all about interpretation



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The English language is funny for many reasons, but it also provides a lot of amusement when misinterpretations happen, as they inevitably will when a language has two words with vastly different meanings, but the exact same pronunciation, as in profit/prophet: The same as net income: total earnings less expenses; A person who speaks for god or a deity, or by divine inspiration. 

I've found the greatest chasms between myself (a native English speaker) and the non-native speaker. Recently, a young Korean gentleman from my volleyball class told me he was going to New York. I asked if he was going to a Broadway show and he said what sounded to me like, Jes, we go to Oprah. Confused, I looked at him and said, Oprah? He said, more emphatically, Op-er-ah. I still didn't get it, so I said, I didn't know Oprah had a show in New York. I thought she was based in Chicago. Are they doing Oprah's life story on Broadway? He smiled and said, no, O-per-a. Oh. I laughed. Opera. Like Mozart. Italian. Opera. Ha. Love communicating with foreigners. It's always fun.

A slightly smaller, though no less significant chasm often happens between men and women. The other day, I asked Marcus to bring me a glass of magnesium citrate. For anyone who doesn't know what magnesium does, the short version is that natural-occurring magnesium in our bodies gets used up because of normal life, and especially because of stress and exercise (hence electrolyte replenishment is all the rage for athletes and is a staple in sports drinks and IV bags - just wish the sports drinks didn't have so much processed sugar and/or high-fructose corn syrup which are definitely not good for us). Magnesium also helps us calm down and very mildly helps us to sleep. Besides balancing our system - stress, exercise and sleep - magnesium citrate does one other very important thing. It helps us pooh more easily. Now I've been taking magnesium for several months now, and I definitely notice that it helps me to fall asleep, but I've noticed the biggest difference in my elimination. Besides eating a diet high in the healthy fats (which many experts say is more important than fiber for elimination), the magnesium definitely makes my number two-ing nice and easy... but not too easy. Nobody likes their number twos to be too easy am I right? (Do I really have to use the word diarrhea? Geesh. I guess I do. Nobody likes diarrhea. Well, nobody I know. Except maybe my friend Andy, and he doesn't so much like it as he likes to talk about anything involving bodily functions. No wonder he became a doctor. He nicknamed is old, brown, beat-up jeep number 3. Think about it. He had to explain it to most people. Number 3 is the combination of number 1 & number 2. Ewe, Andy.)


But back to the story.

On the night in question, I was already comfortably in bed, so I asked Marcus to bring me a glass of magnesium. I told him to just put one tablespoon of the powder in the glass with water. He said ok.

He comes back with my magnesium, and if I were smarter in that moment, I only would've downed half of that glass because it tasted stronger than usual (it has a relatively pleasant citrus taste). The next day I probably should have proposed to the toilet I was on it so much. I scolded Marcus and vowed never to let him get my magnesium for me ever again. Then I inquired, did you use the tablespoon? He said yes, of course. I said, the WHITE tablespoon, you know the one for baking? He said, No, I used a regular big spoon. That's a tablespoon, right? I did a very long and obvious eye-roll, then said, honnney (guys, you know how this honey sounds and it's one-third term-of-endearment, two-thirds pejorative) you're supposed to use the white, more exact tablespoon, not the large, eating spoons! What did you think that just because it was ON THE TABLE that it counted as a TABLEspoon!?!"

At this point we both started laughing, though I was the only one holding my stomach.

My body recovered within 24 hours and I've been solely responsible for prepping my nightly magnesium, but I thought this was so perfect an illustration of how interpretation factors in during even the most simple of every day interactions. So often we believe the other person knows what we are talking about, but so much in life, our interactions, observations, and even our inner commentary on the world, is all about interpretation. 

It's a good argument for taking everything less seriously.

But please, and this really is important, remember to use the proper tablespoon.

By the way, our favorite, most bio-available, easily absorbed, and fortunately reasonably priced magnesium citrate is Natural Calm by Peter Gillham's Natural Vitality. Get the plain/original/natural flavor via the link. The flavored ones might add a little sweetener which is unnecessary and not as healthy as the plain.)










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