How to tame the psycho hose beast

So, you want to know how to tame the psycho hose beast?

One, simple word (or rather, thing).

Food.

That's right. Food. I'm amazed at how unreasonable, pissy and taking-things-personally I can get when food depraved (aka low blood sugar levels). And the worst part is, I might've eaten something recently, but if it's not enough of the right kind of food (which is the good-protein and good-fat having foods), the hose beast roars. It's almost like you just fed a really hungry animal a tiny snack and it just pisses them off more because you're being a food-tease.

Maybe psycho hose beast isn't the right derogatory remark. According to urbandictionary.com's definition of psycho hose beast, I'm a little off because I don't exactly get "needy" "possessive" or "obsessive." Oh, wait. I might get a little obsessive. But more than obsessive, I just get generally pissy and irritable. It's not pretty.

Fortunately, only a small handful of people have seen me like this (I think). Two note-worthy's are Marcus (my guy) and my Mom. They've even shared a few glances and laughs at my expense when this has reared it's head while they're both around.

But once I eat something more substantive, within ten minutes I get all happy and lovey again. It's wild. I don't even feel like the same person!

So it made me curious. What causes this? Am I the only one who experiences this? Please weigh-in on the comments below. While my symptoms aren't severe enough to justify a full-blown hypoglycemia diagnosis (I don't think), it would likely do me well to carry around a small bag of raw nuts around, so I don't go around ball-busting my boyfriend's and other random strangers' nuts (who rarely suffer the full-blown wrath, but certainly get a bit more pissy-ness and sternness than they deserve, or than I'd usually deliver). I feel like I'm the opposite of Gizmo (who was a mogwai or pre-gremlin creature from 80s black comedy flick) who turns into a gremlin, or a red-eyed, fang-sprouting, claw-wielding beast, if fed after midnight. I wonder when you can start feeding Gizmo again. After 6am? 9am? Noon? It's been a while since I saw Gremlins (or Gremlins 2 for that matter), but I don't think the plot ever made it that far. Too boring, I suppose.

But back to how this happens in the body. (In the human body, not for gremlins since I'm pretty sure they're made-up.) Apparently my pissy-ness is merely a cause of low blood sugar. But what does that mean? According to emedicinehealth:

• The body regulates its glucose level—the primary source of energy for the brain, muscles, and other essential cells - by the actions of different hormones. These hormones include insulin (which lowers the blood sugar level) and other chemicals which raise blood sugar (such as glucagon, growth hormone, and epinephrine).

• The role of insulin is to help in the absorption of glucose from the blood by causing it to be stored in the liver or be transported into the other tissues of the body (for metabolism or storage). Glucagon increases the amount of glucose in the blood by breaking down stored glucose (starch, called glycogen) and releasing it from the liver into the bloodstream.

• Glucagon increases the amount of glucose in the blood by breaking down stored glucose (starch, called glycogen) and releasing it from the liver into the bloodstream.
  
• Insulin and glucagon are usually correctly balanced if the liver and pancreas are functioning normally. 

Eyes glazing over yet? I think the above can be summed up by saying that our body's very sophisticated and (I'll just say it) beautifully-designed system is a delicate balance of what hormones and chemicals are released when and at what levels (that in turn affect our energy and the function of our muscles, brain, digestive and immune systems). But here's what stood out for me:

• Traditionally considered a stress hormone, epinephrine (or adrenalin) is made in the adrenal gland and in certain cells in the central nervous system. Epinephrine also elevates blood glucose levels by making glucose available for the body during a time of stress. When this mechanism is not working properly, hypoglycemia can result. Other hormones also help in raising the level of blood glucose, like cortisol made by the adrenal gland and growth hormone made by the pituitary gland. (Source: EMedicineHealth.com)

So maybe it's not just naturally high metabolism. Sheit. The random, day-to-day stress, that really isn't that bad because it's all just small irritations and frustrations, like traffic, parking tickets, money worries, a messy house, are causing more irritability!?! Yikes. I mean, it's not like I'm being chased by a saber-toothed tiger or anything.

Hmmm. Guess I should feed the beast more consistently and... you guessed it, meditate. (I'm also going to use hypnotherapy to see if I can release some of my habitualized irritability. I'll let you know how it goes.)

I'm gonna go meditate. Or eat.

Eat first, then mediate.

Yeah.

More Interesting Katie Strand World Posts

• These boots were made for walking
• Oh boy, that's a good question! or How to Deal with the Census
• Play with the Girls
• If I were a Ninja, I'd wear these shoes
• How my friend Sally became the new First Lady
• My Boyfriend has Autism...Maybe
• Raw Primal Papaya Custard - The Nectar of the Gods
  
• And All the Cows Said Moo!
• If you were John Mayer, you would too
• Tiredness - Varieties of and unforeseen side-effects
• Foreplay is overrated
• Food should be As God Intended or Why isn't everything we eat organic?
  
• Yelling - One of the Highest Forms of Compassion
  
• The Cove - Louie Psihoyos' Oscar speech & a guide on how to create change...
• My Favorite Things...Arrabiata Recipe - Fresh, Organic, Vegan or Primal
  
• My Favorite Shows on Television...or how David Duchovney & Jesus are likely Good in Bed
  
• The Hawaiian Islands and Washington D.C.’s sand-paper circle-jerk about Health Care
  
• My Buddha has Termites...A Lesson in Infinite Joy
• The One-Date-Wonders!
• I had to learn SIGN LANGUAGE when I moved to Los Angeles
• Guys can make a game out of anything
• Hello? The power of CONNECTING and how technology has changed things
  
• Popping the question is better than porn!
• Bravo, Stephen Colbert & Co! and your Olympic Vancouverage
• Songwriting is like SEX
• Born To Run by Christopher McDougall - Inspiring a inspiring all of us to be more in the FLOW
• A moment of silence for all the plastic surgery ca...
• Ricky Gervais should be the new Simon on American Idol
• Muscle SURPRISE! The key to physical, mental & emotional fitness
• I think my boyfriend's a snake...
• Release... Sweat & Power
• MY FAVORITE THINGS! - Vibram's Five Fingers
• Dick Morris... How do you sleep at night?
• Rusty DePass, Gorillas, and Obama, oh my!
• Michael Jackson - Troubled Genius

New Music
&
Posts
at
Katie Strand Music

• Please Don't Leave Me
• Going To California
  
• Come Back
• Home