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Sunday, April 18, 2010

Farts

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Everybody farts.

It's true. Pamela Anderson. Prince Charles. Angelina Jolie. The Pope. The Dalai Lama. Even Jesus. I bet he had serious flatulence while writing and delivering the sermon on the mount. Stress often makes us more gassy.

We all fart. Yet, farting is one of the most denied, embarrassment-producing, blush-inducing, and humorous acts any of us does in public - accidentally or accidentally on purpose (sometimes it's just too much to hold).

Women are supposed to fart less than men, because farting is not cute nor pretty and women are supposed to be cute and pretty and, of course, feminine. Farting, as it has been socially decreed, is not acceptable for women to do freely and proudly. I've known men to fart proudly, but they're usually met with disgust and an eye roll by their female friends or companions. They're met with laughter and stomach-jabs by their fellow men, but also sometimes disgust.

But I'm here to tell you. Women fart. Everybody farts. Beautiful women. Kids. Dogs. Cats. All of the beautiful and lust-inducing celebrities and the not so lust inducing celebrities. We all fart. It's the great equalizer (pooping and peeing too - but those are mostly private activities).

Brad Pitt. Sandra Bullock. Katie Couric. Martha Stewart. Barbara Walters. Barbara Streisand. Though these last three look like they've been holding their farts for years. But I guarantee they've farted at least once a piece in their very proper, held together lives.

Farting is a biological imperative. So let 'er rip, folks! (Though be careful not to shart, an even less appropriate, and way less pleasant experience that is some accidental hybrid between farting and sh!ting.)

The Family Guy, as usual, has given us something to reflect upon... regarding farts.

Not really reflect. They just did a montage of the show's fart scenes and edited it all together so The Family Guy devotees don't have to. Here's the video. Enjoy and remember to like your farts.





 















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