Borrowed Time

First of all, apologies for being so missing in action during this last week or so. I was very busy and continue to be busy with the video we submitted to Oprah. Also, blogger has been temperamental, so even though I've posted new blogs, they don't always email out to everyone as scheduled.

Just so we're clear, the video for Oprah is just the beginning. Both Marcus and I have been steadfast in our intention about this: For the highest good is all we're looking for with Oprah or whatever else may come our way in regard to creating a show that is centered around what Marcus does with his clients. I will absolutely be a player in that I created the show with Marcus and also plan on doing my spiritual and hypnotherapy work with clients on the show, and/or with our clients that we are now seeing.

You've seen the video, so you know a little bit, but I want to tell you all a little more...

Bear with me here. It's good that I'm typing because I get rather emotional when I talk about this.

You see, I got a comment today from an angel disguised as a human. This person had no idea she touched me so profoundly. I randomly spoke with her today about hypnotherapy (as she's a teacher at my hypnotherapy school) and when I mentioned the video we submitted to Oprah (she hadn't connected Marcus and me as a couple yet since she only knows him through facebook), she told me I had to pass along a message. This is what she said,

"Marcus' unconditional positive regard for his clients really comes through on the video. That is why I voted for him...like a hundred times or something. I watched a lot of the videos but this was the only one I voted for. I was very impressed and I'm not easily impressed."

Now this is a very nice compliment. But it reminds me of something else.

Recently Marcus' intensity and what some refer to as "aggressiveness" has come up in conversations. Now let me just say here that he is a very straight-forward dude, and once you're his client (in case this isn't already apparent), he will be a very strong presence and advocate for your health. He checks in constantly with his "birdie" (higher wisdom/spirit guides/whateveryouwannacallit), and though he's human, the mass amounts of information and years of study and meditation have helped him to tap into knowing what will best help his clients get out of their own way. But in the past I've had a hard time with people who I've perceived to be aggressive too... The difference is, when I've seen clients speak their truth with Marcus, he celebrates that they are standing up for themselves. He does not get more intense or aggressive. He wants people to speak their truth and find their voice. Also, he doesn't like yelling or being aggressive, but sometimes he turns up the intensity when people are in their resistance...

Anyway, something occurred to me today under the weight of these two things - Marcus' intensity and his unconditional positive regard.

Marcus is literally on borrowed time. (Geesh. Tears are brimming as I write this.)

He's on borrowed time. When his kidneys failed 12 years ago, his estimated life expectancy was 7-10 years. Once he changed to a different dialysis, they estimated 10-12 years.

We are now, ladies and gentleman, in the 13th year.

Everyone that was simultaneously receiving dialysis with him when he was first diagnosed is now dead. Including an 18-year old girl who seemed to be doing well for years, but then..wasn't.

If you were dealing with people who were resisting their own health and happiness and you were living past when all the doctor's said you'd live, you might be a little intense too.

He knows his way is not the only way. We've spoken a lot about this. Heck, he encourages me to seek other martial arts teachers to see what else I can learn from others.

But his intentions are honest and good. He feels sometimes the best way to get people to let go of their shit is to turn up the heat. Also, once a client signs on to work with him, no matter what they're paying or trading, he will give his all to help them. And he has done literally everything he's had his clients do from dancing naked in your home to fasting to meditation, to overcoming obesity, food obsession, martial arts and sitting with the question, "How glorious are you?" 

And as my new friend said, and I agree, "His unconditional positive regard for his clients really comes through."

That's my man. I'm blessed to be with him. He's blessed to be with me too, for certain.

And just so you know, on a daily basis, I cannot think about this...his being on borrowed time. I just do my best to stay present and enjoy every moment we have together.

Maybe we're all on borrowed time. When you think about it, we are. We're all on borrowed time, but I suspect it tastes different when the doctors are actually telling you that you have x months/years to live. Though it's good to remember, and evident with Marcus, that doctors are sometimes wrong.

How would you live your life differently if you were on borrowed time?

How will you live your life differently...knowing you ARE on borrowed time?

Oprah!

It was fun the first time...

You still have time to VOTE! Plus, voting is unlimited, so you can vote many, many times! Also, share on facebook, twitter or just forward an email to your friends. Voting closes July 3rd.

Go to Oprah's website by CLICKING HERE

Share this with everyone you know & vote many, many times! direct URL: http://myown.oprah.com/audition/index.html?request=video_details&response_id=19017&promo_id=1

A hugging, laughing, happy mess

As many of you know, and some of you are soon to discover, Marcus has kidneys that are currently...asleep or something. Though the doctors can't explain him completely, the medical term for what he has is end-stage renal disease. Most people with this condition are depressed, cranky, low-energy, and a little crazy (due to higher acid levels in the blood - eventually it causes something called uric psychosis - no bueno). Marcus is doing remarkably well considering he hooks up to a machine every night like some bionic man, and does something called peritoneal dialysis. (You can look it up if you want to know more.) If you want to know more details about Marcus' story, check out his blog Unreasonable Happiness. We know he has some kidney function, because his blood levels (with the help of a raw, primal diet- especially the raw, organic, unrefrigerated eggs) are relatively normal. But his blood pressure is a little more sketchy. He's currently unavailable for consultation (i.e. sleeping), so maybe I'll add more detail later, but one of the side effects of his kidneys being asleep is that he often gets woozy or light headed. You know that feeling you get when you stand up too quickly? Well, he gets that feeling all the time even if he stands up slowly. He even gets that feeling when he laughs too hard. Seems to me his blood doesn't make it properly to his brain.

But here's the best part.
Apparently, I'm funny. (I always hoped that I was funny. Things I think in my head are funny and sometimes when I say them, people laugh, but sometimes they just go straight over their heads and under their radar. Nothing worse than the silence of an unlaughed joke.) Anyway. Here's how I know I'm actually funny. I make Marcus laugh so hard he either almost or sometimes fully loses consciousness.

Now the losing consciousness part isn't great. It doesn't happen 100% of the time. Usually while laughing, he'll sputter, "Oh...I'm losing consciousness..." and we take preventative measures to make sure he won't hurt himself if he does fall over, and I usually loudly tell him to breathe. Breathe! 

One time he was sitting at the table and I was doing something goofy and he actually did pass out, but it was early in our relationship so I didn't know he was going to pass out (or I wouldn't held him up), and he actually fell forward and hit his face on the table! I was so freaked out I picked him up off the table, but he had hit the computer keyboard squarely with his front teeth and one of them was cracked, though still intact. I was glad it wasn't worse (concussion, broken nose, tooth broken irreparably or bleeding profusely), but I didn't like that it cracked his tooth. He didn't mind so much. He said he'd healed cracked teeth before and knew in time it would mend (with a good, healing diet, of course).

Anyway, the best and most ridiculous thing that has come from Marcus' physiological quirk is that I've taken to holding him when we laugh, especially when we're out in the world and not near a soft bed or sofa where he can sit down, breathe, and wait for his blood to circulate.

Basically, it looks like this.

We're bantering back and forth about something. I make some crude, clever (I hope), or otherwise unexpected and funny comment, I'm laughing and Marcus is laughing, and Marcus gets that look in his eyes...I know that look now. Then he sputters, "I'm losing consciousness," and I quickly run over and put my arms around him (under his arms - it's hard to hold a passed-out-body up if you're holding them from above their shoulders). He puts his arms around my shoulders and basically we look like two drunks holding each other up while laughing hysterically.

If you're driving by and you see this, you should probably pull over for the show.

It's good times for everyone.

So, I'm proposing a new social edict.

Hold each other when you laugh.

Check it out. When you hold someone who's laughing, it's virtually impossible not to laugh yourself. Also, it's virtually impossible to tell who's holding whom. It becomes a hugging, laughing, happy mess.

Try it out. I think you'll like it.

As always, let me know how it goes.

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